A Fresh Start But First The Rabbit Hole Alice

Hi there!

Yes, there's been another big change in our lives. Hopefully, this will be our forever home together, and my final blog.

Many of you know that I started my writing journey back at the Good Memories Cafe Blog. I was blessed to have a small business that I ran from Etsy and a booth in a local antique mall. That along with the blog I adored kept me busy. I love writing, although I'm not always grammar blessed, it seems to feel like cheap therapy and a creative outlet for me.

After Gary suffered a massive stroke in July 2012, we packed up our lives and moved to our lake house in Port Clinton, Ohio. It's my hometown and seemed like a good place to go and decompress from the horrible year we'd had following Gary's recovery. The plan was to stay a year, in our tiny house (750 square feet) and then decide where we needed to go from there. We ended up staying at the lake house for 2 years. After a lot of thinking in January of this year, we realized it was time to move on. The condo fees and storage fees were zapping what was left of our savings.

I'd been watching for places both here and back in North Carolina. The thought of another 4 state move was not high on the priority list, in fact, a move in general was the last thing we REALLY wanted to do. It had to be done.

So in February the tiny lake house was scheduled to go on the market. It sold before it ever hit the MLS, and suddenly we needed to find something sooner rather than later, and it had to be handicap accessible! Fast forward two months and we began moving on April 1. We found a house completely remolded and accessible for Gary and she was more house than we really needed!

Next the rabbit hole. My "trip" (breakdown, meltdown whatever you want to call it) came in early May. What does that mean you might ask?  We'll it went like this, I couldn't breathe, I cried for days, I snapped, and I had thoughts of complete despair. I was afraid for my own well being. That's right, I fell deep down the rabbit hole. It was a very dark place, and yet a place I was bound for. You see I'd been through enough since the horrible day in July 2012. I'd taken on as much as my poor body, mind and soul could take. I conquered the care that Gary needed, but not my own. I'd taken on that proverbial "straw that broke the camels back".

A large moving truck pulled into our driveway with our North Carolina home in it, and I started crying. I didn't want to take care of another thing. I didn't want any of it, yet it was here now and it had to be dealt with. I cried for the next 45 days it seemed. I reached out to friends and family. I reached out to my doctor for help. I started to climb back out of the rabbit hole and then found something very special... this lovely 116-year-old farmhouse.

At first, I wasn't sure of her. (yes I feel like it's a female) She was bigger than I wanted, way too much land and lawn to mow, and she had her minor issues. Sure she was remodeled, but she'd been empty a while and so little things kept occurring like an a/c unit that kept breaking down and a mouse circus that apparently didn't understand that there were new owners and they had to leave. A a garage door that nearly fell on top of me. There were the boxes and boxes stacked all the way up to her beautiful 12'ft tall ceilings that needed to be unpacked, purged, and repacked (which I'm still dealing with). So all this in addition to my care giving job, and a full blown meltdown did me in!

In June most of the shock and awe were behind me. And my meds were in check (wink, wink)  The house I've named (Charlotte) The 53 Farmhouse seems to have wrapped her loving arms around me. I began feeling more at home with each new day. Something upstairs seemed to be happening. You could see and feel it happening. Rooms started taking on a life of their own somehow. (ok, I had a little to do with the packing, it Charlotte had done it, that be a whole nother story)  All our things were set up for the most part, yet there was no one there to enjoy the space. Ideas were floating around my head, and the ideas were mostly how to get someone there to share the love I was starting to feel. I kept thinking about the importance of having visitors for Gary and I. Since his disability, we've slowly watched the decline of entertaining people at home. We were struggling in the "socializing" department and financially this move hit us in the gut!. With that in mind, and 4 bedrooms and 2 full baths upstairs the idea of renting out rooms took shape. In fact, the idea took off. By the first of July, the whole month was booked with guests from Colorado to Antwerp Belgium! And to say it's been fun is an understatement for us!!! Charlotte seems to spread joy to everyone who steps inside. And we are so grateful to her and to all the wonderful guests who have already passed through her doors with us.

I'm hoping things will continue to thrive for all of us and I plan to share the good memories with you as often as I can.

Hugs from the Farmhouse